It was cold and dark outside. The glooming weather was dampening my spirit. I was sitting on my balcony with my family. Suddenly we heard a screaming noise from Priya's house. We all ran towards her house. As soon as we reached, we stood stumped. We couldn’t believe our eyes. We were trembling with shock.
Priya was hanging from the fan.
Our hearts were not ready to accept that Priya was no more. That day was probably the darkest day for all of us. I could feel the pain her family was going through by the loss of their daughter. The whole house was crying.
In the evening, with our stumbling hearts, we did her funeral.
Days passed, and I could feel the emptiness of Priya in my life. Today, it’s my birthday and I am missing her so much. Every year on my birthday she uses to give me surprises. Since childhood, we have been together and share every shoal of life. We were happy and enjoying our company.
But since she had returned from Mumbai, I had observed changes in her behavior. She seems dull and depressing. Seems like she was upset about something. I tried asking her many times, but, every time she uses to divert the topic. She has incarcerated herself in her room. She has stopped talking and hanging out. To show the world she had a smile on her face. But, I don’t know why I could feel something was wrong.
Slowly, things were returning to their normal pace. Who knew one day this would come. That we will lose Priya.
“But Why? Why did she do this?. She was not that weak person. I can’t believe she just hang herself. Something is not correct. But What? All her investigation showed its a suicide.
Why is my heart is not ready to accept this?
No, she can’t do this? This is just not possible. Something, something I am missing out.”
Knock! knock!
The sound of knocking on the door brought me out of my dream world. I stood up to open the door.
“Hello Aunty, How are You?”. Priya’s mother was standing at my door.
“Happy Birthday Beta may god bless you”.
“Thank You, Aunty. Come Inside. I’ll make a coffee for you”.
“No Beta, Thank You. I have come to give you this”.
“A diary, whose Aunty”, I looked at her in surprise.
She was trying every possible way to hide her tears, but all in vain. She handed me the diary and went with a damp heart.
I was nervous and scared. It was Priya’s diary. But, Why aunty give it to me? What is in that?
I know it is wrong to read someone's personal diary, but I wanted to know the reason behind Priya’s suicide. Might this diary can give me some clues.
And it reads as…
Dear Diary
Dated 21st Nov 2018.
Ugh!!! How can I forget that night?
It was 9:00 pm and I was standing at the bus stop holding an umbrella. The weather was cold and raining heavily. The wind was blowing loudly. The atmosphere seems scary. There was a thick dark silence. The silence, which I couldn’t figure out. As if my intuition were telling me something ominous was about to happen. But What?
The bus was supposed to leave by 9:15 pm, at its usual timing. And the conductor played the song. The song was so loud I could hear it standing outside the bus.
“Bhigi Bhigi Raaton men, Mithi Mithi Baaton Men
Aisi Barasaato Men, Kaisaa Lagataa hai?”
This song eased the commotion in my heart. The gentle beats soothed my nerves. And I started murmuring the song.
Suddenly I saw a guy waving at me. My eyes glowed. He was Sameer, Sameer Singhania, the Love of my life. I was excited and amused to see him. He was wet as he did not have an umbrella. Uff what a six-pack body man, damn hot. I was biting my nails and my adrenaline was rushing in my body. As he ran towards me, I started getting goosebumps and butterflies. He gets under my umbrella. Seeing him so close, my heart skipped a beat. My cheeks were pink. I was blushing.
That moment I felt the heavy rains start sizzling as if god was showering flowers on us. The melancholy weather turned into balmy weather. I was happy and feeling the love. The breeze has refreshed, seems like love was in the air.
“Hello madam, the bus is about to leave. Are you coming?”
The voice of the conductor woke me up from a sweet dream.
“Yes, Bhaiya coming”, I answered him.
Before getting on the bus I felt as if the dream was true and for one last time, I turned back to see if it was real.
“Why today there is heavy rainfall, the wind was blowing fiercely as if the cyclone has arrived”.
“Why I am feeling restless”. I was in turmoil trying to understand my feeling, and my phone beeped.
I was in shock. It was Sameer's message.
The message read “I want to do break up with you”.
Breakup? What does this mean?
I dialed his no, and the response I got from the other side is…
“The number you have called is currently switched off, please try again later.”
I tried.
I called him so many times, but all in vain. He didn’t receive it.
That night I couldn’t sleep. It was the most painful night for me. I was broken.
The guy whom I love, with my full heart and soul, has broken me.
“Sam, You promised me you would never leave me. We will always be together. Where is your promise, Sam? Why this? Why are you hurting me? Talk to me at least, please. Tell me why this is happening? I deserve to know the reason”.
I messaged him for the last time, hoping for a reply.
He never replied.
I died on the inside. My vision was blurry because of tears. I was shutting down. I felt empty. My heart was shattered; it no longer beat the way it used to. Every heartbeat, every breath hurts. I lost my world. I was crying.
This emotional stress leads me to depression. My ties with the world were ruined. I no longer wanted to live. Many questions were swirling in my head, making me go mad.
The place around me was filled with his memories, making me feel so lonely. I was suffocating.
I couldn’t bear this pain. So I decided to move to Mumbai for a change.
Somewhere I had a hope, that we would meet again and we would be together soon.
“Sam, is it You?”
“Why are you behind the trees? Sam! I can see you. Please come into the light. Don’t scare me sam.”
“Sam! Sam!”, I cried
“Sam! Wait for me, Where are you going?”. I saw Sam’s shadow scrambling into the forest and I started following him into the forest.
The forest was dark and scary. I was cold and shaking, and then I started hearing noises. The noise was loud enough to make my ears bleed. The sound of invisible animals. The crying sounds of cats when they are scared, and the hisses of snakes were making me more nervous.
“No Priya, don’t get scared, concentrate. You need to reach Sameer. Focus! Focus!”. I consoled myself and started following Sam.
Sam stood at the edge of a cliff and turned around to me…
“Priya save me. Please!”. Sameer cried.
Suddenly the wind grew stronger, picking up Sameer and sending him spinning and swirling through the air. I was astonished to see Sameer swirling in the air, crying for my help. I ran towards him. But before I could reach him, he vanished.
“Sameer!!!!” I was screaming with fear and woke up from a bad dream. Looked around and calmed me. Wipe off the sweat on the forehead and look at the clock. It was 5:00 am.
After two years, I saw Sameer in my dream, pleading for help, as if he was in some danger. I couldn’t sleep after that.
At 8:00 am.
As usual, I was waiting for my train at the metro station. Then a train came and a girl got down from it. Something seemed familiar, but I couldn’t remember who she was. I focused and quickly got out the phone. Started checking the photo gallery.
“Oh, She is Sameer’s sister”, I exclaimed.
Sameer had shown me his family pictures.
I started following her and reached a place with darkness.
“Arey!!! Where did she go? She was here only. What is this place? Why so much darkness over here?”
I turned on my phone torch to look around and saw a secret door in front of me. Curious to know about the door? I opened it.
“Ahh!!! my ear hurts, Please stop it”.
It's the same scream I had heard in my dream. Yes, this is it. The same scary noise.
What?? How can this be possible? No, I am dreaming. It's a dream. It's just a hallucination.
I blinked my eyes twice or thrice just to see if I was not dreaming. But no, It wasn’t dreaming. It’s the same terrific forest which I had seen in my dream. I was scared and started running aimlessly.
“Hello!! anyone there? Please help me”.
I cried for help, but all in vain.
After an hour of running, I was exhausted. I had no energy to move anymore. My body aches. I was tired. I felt as if I was just running around the bushes.
“Priya! Priya!!”. I heard a female voice.
The voice was so soothing and calmed my nerves. The voice was so mesmerizing that I started following it.
What happened after this? Why are these pages torn? Who tore these pages?
Priya’s diary was torn.
To be continued…
